The trip to Florida took a little over 19 hours during which I happily maintained my present moment awareness.* The trip back from Florida took 22 hours, the first 12 of which I happily maintained present moment awareness. Then we hit traffic. This would not have been so terrible under normal circumstances, however, my husband had a plane to catch that evening and we were pressured to get home sooner rather than later. The stop-and-go traffic made me nauseous (it could have also been all that popcorn on an empty stomach). We spilled milk all over the back seat which gave off an increasingly sour aroma as the trip progressed. The dvd player kept freezing so the children having nothing else to do, were compelled to bicker. To make a long story short, I lost my present moment serenity. Emotions of an unpleasant nature took over and settled in for the next 10 hours.
Interestingly enough, even during this ordeal I was able to clearly observe that my resistance to the situation and my thoughts about it were the primary cause of my unhappiness. For instance; I noticed that the thought, "I can't take this anymore!" directly correlated with high levels of distress. I also tried reminding myself to come into the present moment and for few seconds I was able to be so utterly present that I experienced a momentary melting of unhappiness and even a cessation of nausea. But I was unable to maintain that level of focused attention for more than a couple of seconds at a time. As soon as my concentration slipped, I was back in my unhappiness.
When we finally arrived home and staggered through the front door my 12 year old son burst into tears wailing, "I have to go to school tomorrow!!! I don't want to go to school!!!" He was pretty much on his own with these emotions while I unloaded the car and tried to get some food on the table. He carried on in this manner for a good half hour. However, a little while later I overheard him saying in a self-soothing voice, "I am pouring milk, everything is fine..." "I am eating cereal, everything is fine..." And after that... "I am getting into pajamas, everything is fine..." I caught his eye and we shared a smile. He's heard me say, "stay in the moment," countless times and I finally had the joy of witnessing him internalize this!
* When I say that I "happily maintained my present moment awareness," what I mean is that I repeatedly observed my mind wandering and continuously (and gently) refocused back on the present moment.
