Mistakes

The black spot in the center of this ZIA (zentangle inspired art) was a mistake. A few weeks after I made the mistake I revisited this page in my notebook and started working around the mistake. Since my mind had already labeled this drawing as a mistake, the pressure was off.

I just love how it turned out.

 It makes me wonder what else I have overlooked, disregarded, given up on...

Everyday Activities

I think it might be a good idea for me to start practicing presence during my everyday routines. I am able to cook four-course meals, do laundry, clean the house and get ready for bed all without ever coming fully into the present moment. While my body works on auto-pilot I am lost in (stale, repetitive, uncreative, often negative,) thinking.

Last week at work, I sat across the table from a little girl and noticed her eyes darting back and forth from my left ear to my right ear. I was a little perturbed... what was she looking at? It wasn't until I got home that I noticed I was wearing two different earrings! Guess I was somewhere else during my morning routine that day...

The more present we are, the more peace and serenity we have in our lives. Everyday routines offer a great opportunity for practicing presence.

Cease Cherishing Opinions

 An opinion is just a bundle of thoughts. When I look back, I can see how some of my deeply held opinions have changed over the years. How can I be so sure that the opinions I cherish now wont evolve with time?

When I recognize how fluid opinions can be, I can learn to give other people space to have their own opinions. I can step back and see that my opinions and those of others are just thoughts. They are not connected with our true essence, our source.

The more I derive my sense of self from my opinions, the more I feel threatened by differing opinions of others. When another person rejects my opinion, it can feel as though they are rejecting my very self! When my "self" is threatened, I instantly feel overcome with the urge to defend and attack. I need to make myself right and that means you must be wrong.

But what if I can just accept my opinion and also detach from it at the same time? Then, when another has a differing opinion, I can stay present and observe my reactions. I don't need to defend my opinion at all. I don't need to change anyone's opinion. Through non-reaction I create space. Space for opinions to be and space for love and acceptance...

Non-reaction

Non-reaction to the ego in others is the best way to move through difficulties in a relationship.

When we react based on emotion and fear, we feed and strengthen the ego in ourselves and others. As an alternative we can become deeply present and observe the ego in action. We can recognize the behavior of the other as stemming from the ego, and we can forgive. We can recognize our own reactions as stemming from the ego's fear of diminishment and death. If need be, we can establish firm boundaries without creating further drama in the relationship.

Expectations

"Expectations are future resentments."

-AA saying

Over the last few days I've noticed some feelings of resentment surfacing. When I think about my resentment from an objective perspective I realize that it stems from the word "should."

Some of my common "should" thoughts:

When I do/say... she should do/say... (Really?)

He should have...

She should know by now!

 (They should be different than the way they are.)

 

Some of my common "should" thoughts regarding my own behavior and abilities:

I should be over this by now...

I should have done/said...

I should be able to...

I should be feeling better... 

(I should be different than the way I am.)

Some of my common "should" thoughts about situations:

It should be sunny outside... (Really?)

It should be quieter, cleaner, prettier...

It should be easier...

(It should be different than the way it is.)

It appears that letting go of these "shoulds" might eliminate some painful moments in my life. 

The point of power is always in the present moment. In this moment, I can fully face the emotion without labeling or judging it and without feeding it with my thoughts. I can accept that it is here and that it arose out of my unconscious thought patterns. And now I can let it go...

 

 

Increasing Awareness

Being aware of our surroundings helps anchor us in the present moment. We can always grow in awareness of what is around us. Colors, sounds, people, trees, birds... When we observe with a quiet mind the world becomes fresh and beautiful.

On Sunday I took a brisk walk on the boardwalk. I decided I would try to stay focused on the movements of my body and the natural beauty of the ocean. Try as I might, my noisy mind continued chattering away; commenting, judging, reviewing past conversations, planning, daydreaming. I had gone half a mile before I realized I was so caught up in my mind I hadn't even heard the sound of the waves.

It is often frustrating and discouraging to observe how little control I have over my mind. When this happens I try to simply observe my thoughts and accept their energetic momentum. I always have another chance to refocus on the present moment. I can increase my awareness one moment at a time, and listen to the waves...

Present moment reminder

In order to experience spirituality in our lives we must come into the present moment. 

We cannot be in alignment with the purpose of creation in the past or future, 

but only in this moment. 

Now.